JAN. 1: At one minute past midnight, Newt Gingrich signs an Executive Order dissolving the EPA, FDA, FCC and FAA. Aides caution him that the election is still 11 months away.
JAN. 2: Angered by reports that the Obama Administration wants to raise taxes on the wealthiest Americans, NBA players begin a strike that “threatens the remainder of the season.”
AN. 14: Newt Gingrich says the New Year’s story is being “deliberately distorted by media,” explaining that he was merely giving aides “historical guidance” about Executive Orders.
FEB. 2: Sec. of State Clinton signs a landmark agreement stipulating that for every dollar the U.S. borrows, it will now receive two miles in the Air China rewards program.
FEB. 24: On Capitol Hill, as the House debates emergency legislation to avoid a government shutdown, Speaker John Boehner discloses that due to a clerical error two years earlier, the government has been shutdown since March 2010.
MARCH 8: At a hastily called news conference, Donald Trump declares that if Greece cannot “get its financial act together, I will step in and run for Prime Minister.”
MARCH 17: A new Gallup poll shows the GOP presidential race tightening. Romney leads with 4 percent of all registered Republicans, followed by Gingrich at 3, with Perry and Paul tied at 2.
MARCH 18: Rick Perry drops out of the presidential race, telling reporters: “I should have listened to the advice of, uh, Sally Palin, the, you know, former mayor of Alaska, when she suggested that I write the tough answers on my hand.”
APRIL 3: On the eve of the new baseball season, Major League owners approve expanded use of instant replay. Umpires will now use multiple TV angles to determine if any batted or thrown ball has been interfered with by players’ spit.
APRIL 5: Following a “heartbreaking” 23-4 Opening Day loss to Detroit, the Boston Red Sox fire manager Bobby Valentine. Valentine will return to ESPN’s Sunday Night Baseball, replacing Terry Francona.
APRIL 6: People.com reports that Demi Moore and Charlie Sheen are engaged.
APRIL 11: Fox News Channel cancels low-rated “Huckabee,” and replaces it with “Raising Cain,” starring former presidential candidate Herman Cain.
MAY 10: The Labor Department identifies Bill “Smitty” Smith of Omaha as the last unemployed person in America. It is noted that official unemployment figures do not include those who have “given up” looking for work.valentines flower delivery
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